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You know, I seem to be really enjoying myself

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I used to be somewhat depressed a few years back. Some 6 or 7 years. Can't even remember why, probably some stupid ass teenage bullshit.

But now, damn. I really love being alive. So I know some of you are having a hard time with life, tough shit going on, or simply can't find motivation to do anything. But it gets better. Just concentrate and what you truly like.

There's so much stuff I like. Well, not much. But the few things I like are so damn deep that it will take me years to get enough done. 

Besides my startup (which is consuming me, fuck it all I want some rest), I really, reaaaaally like videogames, to the point that I'm studying design in my free time. 3D modeling, texture creation with Photoshop, programming (though I already know plenty), graphics, engine creation, Unity, etc. I'd really like to make something, even if small, that can capture those things I've felt when playing some of my favorite games. Can't really put it into words.

Then there's music. I was actually going to be a full time musician, I went to a very good music school, already had some 10 months of practice. 3 weeks in the school and I noticed that I couldn't live off music, it's too personal for me so I dropped out and went into tech.
I've not been able to play for 2 years or more, since I have little to no time nowadays. But I really want to keep at it, I already got some music theory book recommendations, and I got some music sheet for stuff I want to play. Will even play a bit since there's a piano at my parent's.

The above, combined with what I'm already learning with and for my startup company is huge. The only thing I can complain about is the lack of time I have now. Startups consume your very soul, seriously.

And then there's books. This one is very recent but I've become a bit of a bookworm.

So I know this doesn't mean crap for most of you, I just felt like writing it. May even be of some help to those of you that have been feeling like shit for a while.

Now, I'll go back to work or I'll be in trouble tomorrow. I'm scared.


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It's nice to see someone being positive, i will admit the last month has been odd for me to say the least. But my life is pretty good as well have a car and money in the bank an ok job for now, should be done with school for a little  soon which makes me happy. Also found out i am going to be an uncle which i am not sure how to feel about.

Sometimes you have to take a step back and look at your life to truly appreciate it because it's easy to be upset with the little things in life.

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I partly made this because I've noticed that some people here were feeling bad, or just had plenty of negativity. You're right, in that last paragraph. I'm at a point where I rarely get mad or depressed, I just laugh and get on with it, little things don't affect me anymore.

Oh god I hate this shit, I tried 2 payment gateway providers and they hate me. There's always a small detail that shits all over me, like needing an U.S. SSN. I now have to resort to... *shudders* PayPal. It looks like crap, the other providers were pretty simple but PayPal doesn't seem to work the way I'd like it to. I'm tired of reading documentation and APIs for today, but I have to.

I'm scared, my anus is not ready for tomorrow. Or for an all nighter if I have to pull this off tonight.

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I try to work on that, one little thing going wring snowballs and ruins my head, I overthink stuff too much and get overwhelmed

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I'm enjoying myself too Smile

I love you <3

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Yeah I gotta say I'm in a pretty ok spot too. I'm still working towards some goals and dreams so there's still plenty of journey ahead of me but I feel good about the person I am and life in general.

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